Reality is all about perspectiveS
a Masculine / Feminine dialogue
“Reality is all about perspectiveS,” I said to a friend just now. “It is up to each of us which perspective we choose. It is best to be aware of all of them.”
He replied: “Thàt is impossible! I can never know all perspectives.” As usual, he had a very forward energy field in his response, too. :-)
He didn’t choose to ask me a genuinely curious question. For example: why do you say that? Or: what do you mean?
His reply in itself, however, is an accurate statement: no single individual can know all perspectives about everything or anyone. We càn find out more perspectives, in genuine curiosity though ;-). In the capacity to listen freely, without prior convictions on topics, nor about people. Just saying: passive aggressive questions are not the same thing.
Had he asked me a genuinely curious question, I could have answered something like this:
“We is the sum of you and I. I cannot see you, nor understand you, when I do not show genuine curiosity. You cannot see me, nor understand me, when you do not show genuine curiosity. We cannot learn anything new, when we don’t. In other words:
1+1 = 3. Simple math! :-)”
As my brain often thinks in pictures, and I can thus not always find the best words to describe my point soon enough, I’ll use the one enclosed to underpin my point.
Does that make sense, she asks genuinely curious?
In my humble opinion, I also second a quote from Sir Laurens van der Post: “Perhaps, no (wo)man is more frightening, than the (wo)man who is fully convinced he, or she, or X is right.” It’s one of the tiles in my toilet room actually, as a daily reminder to try to remain genuinely curious, even in those cases. Simply because I know we generally do not perceive things or people as they are. We perceive things or people as we are…
I am proud of myself, today, for having a little chat with a dear friend and not get triggered by it, too much. I’ve asked lots of genuinely curious questions myself in life, everywhere on Earth, and always listened attentively. It’s also why I know that without a genuinely curious question posed, an answer generally cannot be truly heard… We would just end up in a disconnecting butting-heads situation, which drains my energy too much, as I am a connector and an Empath.
Ironically, few people ask me those kind of questions, which does sadden me, at times. So I choose to write away that sentiment today, as what saddens me even more, is to observe people butting heads, unnecessarily, often. My friends have called in my help in relationship predicaments many times. I don’t know why; maybe because I just don’t like to see people fighting, instead of connecting?
Anyway, may I propose to all of us ever reading this, to ponder about it for a bit? To try it out amongst ourselves? And even when all else fails, to agree to disagree but to never stop loving each other? Just saying: my friend and I hugged bye-bye see you next time.
I’ll go out to hopefully capture another butterfly on my camera. Nature always gives me so much connection.
[added addition, as a friend falsely assumed I am in the dark, potentially after reading this post - this is what actually happened: someone unexpectedly rang my doorbell right after I posted this. And there she was, 7 year old La Lucia and her mom, asking me to join them into Nature. So that made it a double bingo day! And presented me with another example of #flow.]
Have a joyous day together!
Joy
PS: I follow Frontline Communication on LinkedIn. Sadly, I do not dare to salute their work anymore as I experience some digital complications with my devices etc, and I do not wish to cause anyone harm. It is thanks them, sharing this TEDx talk by Andy Bradley on it, I’m adding it to this post. Kudos to Andy! One day, I hope my kudos will reach him… #compassion #connection.
I also noted his grace to state he’s learned this from women in his life.
Just as a note to myself, 1 of my re_memberings, which is not the same as memory, btw.
Over 3 years ago, an empathy coach wrote online: "Everyone voting for political party X, has no empathy."
This is misinformation. It is -in fact- a conviction from this particular coach.
I flinched noting that.
In general, it scares me to see people claim a word like empathy, whilst being utterly unable to show it, in public.
So, to whomever reading this, one day: some of the wise words of my very loving mother: "Buddha didn't have a teacher either. Keep your own mind and heart open, always!" Teachers can be very valuable; their opinions also are not always correct.
Gosh. I miss her today. Very much. She died way too soon. Ironically cancer got to her, even though her health had been on her radar all her life. Adamantly. She therefore also has been the one teaching me that convictions, any conviction, can actually kill you. In more ways than one.
We all are multi-facetted, perfectly imperfect human beings. We all need each other. So: if even empathy is a word hi-jacked, can we please try to remain genuinely curious and compassionate?
I also feel like a lucky girl today. Because I do have people around me I can call my friends. I feel so blessed. I know they will not be offended when I say that nobody can replace my mom, for me. And that I wish there were more people like her, on Earth. I perceive a lot of 'eve-trauma' all round, as I call it, you see. Perceiving even genuine curiosity as criticism, for example. It has always bewildered me. But hey, I honestly didn't know many people use questions in a passive aggressive way. I only figured that out a few years ago, believe it or not.
Hurrah - never stop learning! ;-)
Just as a note to myself : remember to describe the words 'conscious capitalism', which you use, even though nobody asks you what you mean by that.
In short I feel inspired by the ancient / indigenous Swedish economic system Lagom. Which means, in short: enough = enough. In other words: all of us can buy what we need. Not just what we want. Retail therapy and all.
A general word capitalism receives a lot of resistance these days. Yet the values of it, for example freedom, are grounded in Lagom, as well. Likewise Lagom remembers that we all are but a humble part of Nature.
That's all for now.